I’m a pretty independent person. I struggle with letting others help me. I like to figure out how to do something and then take it from there. I think it might be a defense mechanism; if I do it myself, then no one else can mess it up, it will be on me. Clearly I have some control issues that the Lord is still reconciling. But anywhoo, a lot of times this affects my walk with the Lord. As he teaches me new things, for some reason I pick them up and begin to make them my responsibility. This is fine for a minute, until I begin to cave under the pressure. The truth is whatever I pick up, becomes my responsibility to carry. But if I leave everything in God’s hands then He carries it for me.
I forget sometimes that my job is to be obedient and surrendered to Him; his job is everything else.
Isn’t it funny how we make our freedom in Christ our responsibility to maintain sometimes? He saved us so that we could be free, but we begin to take responsibility for maintaining our freedom. If we were good at maintaining freedom, he wouldn’t have had to come to the world in a manger and die a sinner’s death on the cross. But he did, to save us from ourselves.
I love that God wants to maintain my freedom. I love that no matter how many times I begin to make things my responsibility, he gently takes the things I pick up and reminds me that they aren’t mine to carry.
You’re freedom in Christ is just that… freedom in Christ.
What have you picked up lately that wasn’t yours to carry?
Today I took my granddaddy to the hospital for an outpatient procedure. I brought my lap-top and my lunchbox, because I need snacks in my life, and left everything else in the car. I had two bags and that was manageable. We went into the prep room and they got him ready. Before they rolled him off, he gave me his bag of belongings and his crutches. Now instead of two bags, I had three bags and a set of crutches. Boy did I look silly. I walked down to the coffee shop because we left at 5:00 a.m. and it was necessary. The whole way there I tried not to make eye contact with anyone because I knew what they were thinking, “Geez that girl has a lot of stuff in her hands.” “She looks super awkward carrying that stuff.” “Aww, bless that girl’s heart, she is struggling to carry her things.” And I was… I was struggling. I had to be very strategic as I walked so that I didn’t hit anyone with the crutches or the bags. I began to feel anxious because I was carrying so much and it was so hard to manage. In life it’s the same way. When I carry things that aren’t mine to carry, I feel heavy and weighed down. When I feel heavy and weighed down, I begin to get antsy and anxious.
1 Peter 5:7 NIV says “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
Oh how I wished I had someone to come into the hospital today on a white horse and offer to carry my bags. That would have made my day so much easier! But that didn’t happen.. and I carried the bags everywhere I went. 1 Peter 5:7 says that we do have someone in life who comes in on a white horse and offers to carry our bags, so why don’t I let him? Why don’t you let him? Today I’m choosing to give Jesus my bags, because he saved me so that I could be free.
God thank you for offering to carry my burdens. I’m sorry that I try to do it all alone when all you’ve ever done is offer to take my everything so that I can be free in you. You are my knight in shining armor, my savior, my provider. Today I am choosing to give you all of my burdens because you died so that I can be free. Lord I surrender to you because I know that you are good and I can trust you. Remind me daily that my life is yours and you care about me.
In Jesus’ Name,